The 5 Types of guys.

I am an over-thinker and over the years it has definitely been both a gift and a curse for me. I feel like when it comes to relationships I can easily become distracted and turn the other cheek when it comes to bullshxt. I often find myself talking to the same FIVE types of men. While these men are all different in description and credentials, I can pretty much sum them up into 5 categories: The thug, the push over, the player, the church boy and the go with the flow guy. Let me explain myself.

"The Thug"
Guy #1 You meet thisattractive, smooth talking, nice dressing, good cologne smelling man and you come to the realization that why yes he is fine, he isn't about shit. He has baby-mama's and babies all over the place. He doesn't have a legal 9-5. He spends his money stunting on material things such as jewelery, rims, cars, clothes, sneakers, alcohol and club admission. Physically to the eye he is everything but he is lazy and content with not being shit. The only thing he is good for sex. The thug is the perfect plumber. This is that one guy that you call merely when you need your pipes cleaned. You don't care about anything else. No extra conversations, unnecessary texting etc. His only job is to do the dirty work and depart. All women have that guy. He may not necessarily be a thug, but he does carry some of those traits. Sometimes you wish you can take his mainly parts and stick them on another person.

"The Push Over"
Guy #2. He is definitely not eye candy, but you can definitely take this guy to meet your grandma and she will instantly love him. He has a great personality but he's lame as hell. He has job security and makes an efficient amount of money, so he has the ability to splurge and spoil you a little more. He is the guy with all of  his shit together: good job, own house, nice vehicle, and no kids. Physically he is not the guy you would typically be attracted to, but he looks good on paper. You don't like him as much as he likes you, so you find yourself getting annoyed easily and punking him. You can say things to him like shut up and he will literally shut up in fear of upsetting you. Not because he's a punk but because he likes you THAT much.  He can be fun to be around simply because you don't have to do anything to impress him. He is just that uber nice guy who doesn't know how to handle you.

"The Player."
Guy #3 Then its the guy who thinks he's Bill Bellamy in How To Be A Player. He's attractive, funny, has a job, while all that is good you KNOW your are one of many in line. He knows he is attractive and doesn't plan on settling down anytime soon. He is very well a ladies man and he doesn't know when to turn of his flirting switch. You can be hanging out with him and girls will just walk up and hug him like your not standing there. He gives you butterflies because physically he's perfect but mentally and emotionally he does nothing for you. Although he has a great personality, you know building a relationship with this guy is destruction at its finest. Personally I am spoiled and I don't like sharing. Especially when it comes to my man.

"The Church Boy"
He was probably raised in single parent household by either his mother or grandmother. Don't get me wrong nothing is wrong with that, but this man has characteristics of a mama's boy. Since he was raised by women he thinks he has the upper hand on women, when he really has no clue. He is on a spiritual plane trying to better himself, which is attractive but he is overly spiritual. I am a Christian and a strong believer that you have to first seek God to find a God fearing partner, but he is over the top. Its impossible to hold a conversation with this man without him quoting a bible scripture. He thinks he is too deep and knows it all. He makes you feel bad by some of the choices you make. For example he will say things such as, "Are you going to leave the house with that dress on?" "I don't like my woman listening to that type of music." "Ugh you drink?" Hell even Jesus turned water into wine. I hate when people are overly religious. I love Jesus but damn live a little. Don't get me wrong I want a Christian man, just not a man who makes me feel bad for listening to Boosie and Jeezy from time to time.  

"The Go with the flow Guy."
Guy #5. Your physically attracted to this man and you have great chemistry. Although he has one child, he is a very responsible individual who takes good care of them. He has his shit together. He has good sex, and he even goes to church on a regular basis. He is everything you would want in a guy, but he doesn't give any innovative or aggressiveness when it comes to spending time and conversing with you. It seems as if you have to make all the moves and decisions in this situation. Whenever you suggest something he's that guy who says sure and he doesn't care. Talking to him is a challenge and you feel like you can get a better response if you we're speaking to a brick all. When you ask his opinion he never cares about anything, which pushes you away. You find yourself wearing the skirt, pants, bra and tie in this relationship. This is the guy you would probably date just to be in a relationship. But you know the relationship wouldn't get too far.
I always find myself in the same predictable situations when it comes to guys. They all fall into one of the 5 categories. If only I can take ingredients from each different type of guy and put them all into one I would have the perfect man for me. I know that no one is perfect but the guys that I find myself talking to are a waste of energy and space. Honestly I would rather be alone. It sucks because I want something real and genuine and I refuse to settle and just take what I can get so I can say I have a man. I am not and I refuse to be "that girl," its not worth it. 


KeshaKa$h said...

If nobody feels your closing statement ...I do!!! Great read!!

Amber Lee. said...