Having a blog can be bittersweet, solely because I often find myself somewhat having to silence my thoughts about certain people. I promote my site on twitter and facebook and that gives people easy access to depict my brain. I know people comprehend and interrupt things differently, so I guess I try to limit blasting people by not being messy. Whenever I'm involved with someone they always ask me to write a post about them, which is super weird to me.Realistically if I really like you I'm rarely going to mention you, just so I wont jinx our situation. Whelp that was until now. In the great words of Eminem, "Be careful what you wish for cause you just might get it, and if you get it then you just might not know what to do with it." This boys and girls is a sincere blast post dedicated to him. He knows who he is.
So I met this uber cool and funny individual and we hit it off immediately. He quickly made me feel at ease and comfortable around him, in a strange way it felt as if we have known one another forever. Our text messages soon became hours upon hours on the phone. At first I started off playing games, but I gradually began to develop feelings for this man. The first time we were alone with each other I allowed my sexual frustration to get the best of me. Although the sex wasn't necessarily the best, for that night my sexual urge was fulfilled. Usually if I sex someone and it isn't better than my last I scratch them off the list and go into hiding. But for some reason this wasn't the case, since I actually grew to like him.
We live in two different cities and our schedules would often conflict with one another, so our time physically seeing each other was very limited. I've learned once you allow yourself to talk to someone and genuinely get to know them that chances of developing a sincere relationship is greater. For us our foundation was based on more then what physically attracted the eye. For me it was more than just looks, he was a guy who could actually hold a decent conversation and I felt like I could tell him anything. Last week in particular our phone calls were very restricted. I can only reach out so much before I exceed my number of tries and give up. I thought he was having an episode, so I gave him his space and left him alone. Note this man is not exclusively mine, so I proceeded on with my single behavior lifestyle.
It was the Friday before Valentines Day. I was tipsy in my friends apartment playing beer pong and taking random shots of liquor. The next thing I know my phone vibrates with a text message from him that read, "On my way home." I looked at it and didn't reply. Honestly I was confused on why he would wait until after midnight to say something to me, especially since this is our first form of communication in days. Minutes later I found myself in the bars with friends and continued drinking and not giving a damn. He later called me, asking where I was and if I was going home. Long story short I didn't go home, I continued on with my SB (single behavior). Saturday rolls around and he calls wanting to hangout, but I previously made plans. I offered to opt out from clubbing but I was in the mood of doing something and I didn't want to be cooped up in the house. He basically told me to carry on with my previous plans, because he didn't want to do anything.
Since I rarely go out I told him to come over to my place once I left the club. He agreed to come over and everything seemed fine. So now it's 3am and the club is over. I'm now horny as hell and ready to go rounds, and he doesn't answer the phone. Instead he shoots me a text message back, saying whats up? I proceed to call him instead of replying to the text and he again doesn't answer. (He later "claims" he was asleep, although idk anyone who text you sleep instead of answering, but that's another post.)Anyways I was beyond pissed and sexually frustrated, so I went to bed sexually frustrated, tipsy and mad.
Now its Sunday. He comes over to see me before he heads back to the state in which he lives. Everything is good and I even persuade him to spend the night and just leave in the morning and he agreed. I'm sleepy and just want to cuddle up with him, since we haven't seen each other in months. He on the other hand wants sex. I tell him I'm not horny, so if he wants to have sex he needs to get me on the same level as him. First he tried to finger me and I hate being fingered, so that was a fail. I become irritated and I told him stop and do something else. He then goes down south and begins eating like he hasn't ate in days. It was so good that I had to eventually stop him and tell him to I was ready for the D.
He kills the mood and starts indirectly asking for head. I don't have a problem giving head, however we have had previous conversations numerous times about how I only felt comfortable doing the deed with my boyfriend. In my defense he's an athlete and I know they stereotypically get around. So here I am with trust issues talking to an athlete who lives in another state, how cute. If I put my mouth on you I need to see some std results or have the comfort of a relationship. I know being in a relationship doesn't mean he wont cheat on me but I would have faith and hope that he would be faithful. I love sex, but I love my disease free self more. So if you can't fully commit or show your "car fax" results, your not fully getting it. Long story short he gets mad, so mad that he refuses to have sex with me. Whelp. At first he gave me the silent treatment, then gets up and proceeds to put his clothes on. I'm not a chaser, so I just look at him. Once he is fully dressed he says, "Come lock the door." I respond by saying, "Are you seriously leaving because I wont give you head?"He continues walking and ignores me. He actually opened the door and left without uttering a single word, not even a simple ass goodbye.
I was shocked, pissed off, confused, annoyed and most of all still horny! We still have not spoken yet and I honestly can give two f-cks if we do. I can find humor in any and everything, and this my friends is a funny ass situation. I've never witnessed a man get so mad over not getting head in my life, that he ignores the cooch. I wont even mention all of his little business but come on son you ignored the cooch, who does that? Don't blame my lack of "knowledge" for your lack of being able to keep your GPA up. Knowledge is power. Pxssy is powerful.