I miss my grandmother



I felt my grandmothers presence around me this morning. When i woke up i could smell her scent. And felt a chill. I just smiled and said I love you. I was thinking of her yesterday. She died when I was 13. But she played a big roll in my life. Her death hurt me so much. I blamed myself for years. I don't want to get in the story I'll start crying while writing and i don't have time. i just put eyeliner on.

But when she first died i used to feel spirits. I remember i was about to go to sleep one night and it felt like someone was pushing my body down. I couldn't scream. I couldn't speak. I started crying. And immediately started praying and then i got free from whatever it was. I jumped up and was breathing hard. I sat up for like 20 minutes before attempting to go to sleep. Then it happened again. I started praying and it went away. I got up and put on a gospel cd and was perfectly fine. Everytime i tell people the story they all look at me like I'm nuts. But i was talking to my psychology teacher about it in high school and she said it could of been a spirit.

But like i said. I smelled her perfume. I could feel her near me. It was comforting. I miss her alot.

4 comments:

Sexxy Luv said...

glad you're done blaming yourself for loosing your grandmother.

i've heard that before about the spirits...my ex told me something like that...interesting

☆αmbєr said...

yeah the spirit stuff is crazy.

tris. said...

when my ex boyfriend died.
i blamed myself too. i wasn't too far from him the night he died and i believed by some sort of miracle i could have saved him.
there are moments when its completely silent...i feel him standing next to me.
i feel his presence and its sooo strong...
[unbelievable.]
i miss him.
i'm glad someone else understands.

Katrina said...

Im so sorry about your loss. I do believe that it could be spirits that you felt. Keep smiling, your grandma is watching you from God's House.